Friday, December 4, 2009

December 4, 2009

Dear Diary,

Now can we call it 'smooth sailin'?' Tonight was the other big event that I've been preparing for and it was also loads of fun. I'm glad that things always work out in the end. And when you get large groups of women together, the topic inevitably turns to men at some point. So there were many stories swapped about good guys and bad guys and smart guys and dumb guys. At one point it was a community counsel on the way men and women are different.

It has been suggested that women need to vent and men need to fix. This can often cause problems, but this is one that most of us are aware of. Another difference between us is that when women feel confused and concerned, we tend to need to 'talk.' Men view this as they are 'in trouble,' and they retreat. We freak out and they grow less and less attentive. So perhaps a cure is to give them space but to make sure that we pronounce in some manner the things that we 'respect' about them. To flatter them in a way that they actually feel flattered.

A hard one to figure out, I think. Our instinct is to connect, their instinct to retreat. How do you overcome that?

Perhaps tomorrow I can tackle the problem of not only the retreat, but where are they to begin with?...

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