It seems that the Advent Season has come and gone once again and we have begun the lessons and running of the household once more. This happened nearly a fortnight ago, and yet I have only now had the time to sit and compose such a letter. The season brought many welcome visitors to the estate, and in their present absence, I suppose I find myself with a bit of melancholy at the silence and stillness that is now life at Ashford.
It is customary for one to propose the likelihood of change in the coming months, whether to one's figure, occupation, or general lifestyle, but I have been remiss at making such resolutions. And I now feel a bit the lesser for it. It would seem a bit folly to now propose a resolution of proposing such resolutions, but nevertheless, that is precisely my aim. However, I suppose my lack of resolve comes not from a lack of ambition, but rather a lack of need for resolution. The year previous has given me an abundance of rewards, and it is hard to think what more must change. I have acquired a modest estate, an occupation in which I feel useful, and a nephew that quite honestly one cannot "resolve" to acquire. As I had resolved last year to do, I read the full text of the Holy Scriptures, and will continue their study in the year to come.
Among these rather large accomplishments, I achieved some smaller victories as well, and I tell you that I ended December quite happy and content. So, what then shall I resolve to do for this thirteenth year? Ought I again to make overtures of my figure, or declare I shall be engaged by year's end? A husband is not a thing to be commanded and obtained because I declared it so. And one's figure is always a topic of improvement in January, that it seems rather trite or cliche to mention it. I cannot bring myself to make such a promise. Would that I had not recently acquired a pianoforte, perhaps I could resolve to do so, but that too has added to my contentment. I tell you, I am a miserably contented woman!
Perhaps rather than seeing life as something on which to improve, I ought instead to see it as something to embrace and experience. And yet, I still feel as though I must insist on resolution. Therefore, I resolve to see you again on the morrow.
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